‘This is a first-world problem’: I can’t roll over my $800,000 401(k) from my prior employer. What did I do wrong?

I strongly prefer not to take the RMD. It seems I am being penalized for moving the account: Leaving it at Fidelity requires no distribution, but attempting a rollover triggers one. One alternative would be for Fidelity to distribute the full balance (minus 20% withholding) to me, use $160,000 from an after-tax brokerage account to cover the withholding, then roll the full amount into Schwab. But the opportunity cost of tying up $160,000 with the IRS, along with potential capital-gains taxes from liquidatin ...