35 岁后，我终于敢说“我想要”

Core Insights - The article discusses the feelings of disillusionment and lack of motivation experienced by many individuals in their 30s and 40s, often attributed to financial pressures, relationship strains, and the challenges of aging [3][10][12] - It emphasizes the importance of recognizing and confronting personal desires rather than suppressing them, suggesting that many people live according to external expectations rather than their own [10][11][32] Group 1: Personal Reflection and Societal Expectations - Many individuals in their 30s and 40s feel a lack of energy and motivation, often leading to a "low-consumption" lifestyle [3][4] - The societal pressure to conform to certain life paths can lead to a disconnection from personal desires, resulting in a passive approach to life [8][10] - The article highlights that many people are conditioned to view desires as shameful, leading to a reluctance to pursue personal interests or ambitions [7][11] Group 2: Strategies for Self-Discovery - The author shares methods for individuals to reconnect with their desires, including reading autobiographical literature to find personal reference points [14][15] - Engaging with diverse experiences can help break free from conventional life patterns and reveal alternative ways of living [15][16][19] - Financial security is presented as a foundation for pursuing personal desires, with a recommendation to save a significant portion of income to create a "desire fund" [21][22][24] Group 3: Identity and Role Exploration - The article discusses the importance of distinguishing between societal roles and personal identity, suggesting that individuals should explore what they truly want beyond their assigned roles [25][26] - A "role stripping exercise" is proposed to help individuals identify their true desires by removing societal labels and expectations [26][27] - Establishing clear personal values and actionable goals can help translate abstract desires into concrete actions [28][30] Group 4: The Importance of Continuous Self-Inquiry - The article concludes that the most significant risk in midlife is not achieving specific goals but realizing that one has never truly lived for oneself [31][32] - It encourages individuals to continuously ask themselves what they truly want, emphasizing that it is acceptable to take time to explore and make mistakes [33][34] - Acknowledging and embracing desires, regardless of their size, is framed as a victory in personal growth [35]