永远不要把别人拥有的，当作你自己失去的

Core Viewpoint - The article emphasizes the importance of focusing on one's own life and happiness rather than comparing oneself to others, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy and jealousy [10][24][90]. Summary by Sections Section 1: Relative Deprivation - The concept of "relative deprivation" is introduced, explaining how individuals often feel envious when they see others succeed, leading to negative emotions [7][8]. - The article suggests that most suffering comes from internal comparisons rather than external circumstances [9][10]. Section 2: Personal Stories and Comparisons - The narrative of two friends, Chen Kaixi and Roman, illustrates how comparing life paths can lead to jealousy and damage relationships [11][17]. - Roman's journey highlights the realization that personal fulfillment should not be measured against others [19][20]. Section 3: The Impact of Envy - A case study of a colleague's housing situation demonstrates how envy can lead to negative emotions and deteriorating work relationships [25][30]. - The article cites that envy can lead to a downward spiral of dissatisfaction and self-doubt [31][32]. Section 4: Social Comparison Theory - The article references Leon Festinger's "social comparison theory," which explains how individuals often evaluate themselves based on others, leading to feelings of inadequacy [36][37]. - It argues that comparing oneself to others can obscure one's own value and identity [38][42]. Section 5: Finding Personal Value - The narrative of Yu Minhong illustrates the importance of recognizing one's unique path and not succumbing to societal pressures [46][55]. - The article emphasizes that true fulfillment comes from understanding and pursuing one's own goals rather than competing with others [58][60]. Section 6: The Role of Gratitude - Research from the Zuckerberg Neuroscience Center indicates that gratitude can enhance happiness and a sense of belonging [71]. - The article concludes that happiness is not about achieving everything but appreciating what one has [86][89].