have you ever opened a jar of Crisco and proceeded to slather it all over your body I have I know what you're thinking half of you in this room are old enough to know exactly why I would do such a thing and the other half of you probably haven't held a jar of Crisco in years if ever you see it was the summer of 1992 and I was just exiting the sixth grade my friend was over and our plan was to lay out all afternoon and work on our sentance as I grabbed our towels I reached for the brown bottle of suntan loti ...