Core Viewpoint - The article emphasizes the importance of self-worth and the negative consequences of seeking validation from others, highlighting that relationships should be based on mutual respect rather than one-sided efforts to please [9][54]. Group 1: Personal Stories - The story of Wang Qing illustrates how excessive pleasing behavior in a workplace leads to a lack of respect from colleagues, ultimately resulting in her feeling undervalued and self-doubting [10][18]. - Lydia's experience shows the pressure of parental expectations, leading her to lose her sense of self and happiness while trying to meet her family's demands [21][28]. - The narrative of singer Tsai Chin reveals how her efforts to support her husband went unappreciated, culminating in a painful realization of her own sacrifices and lack of recognition in the relationship [30][36]. Group 2: Psychological Insights - Psychologist Zhang Defen notes that unhealthy relationships often reflect the individual's lack of boundaries, teaching others how to treat them poorly [39][41]. - The article suggests that relationships requiring excessive effort to maintain are unlikely to be fulfilling or lasting, as they often stem from imbalanced dynamics [56][60]. Group 3: Healthy Relationship Dynamics - The example of Ding Haifeng and his wife Tang Ge demonstrates a balanced relationship where both partners support each other, leading to mutual growth and happiness [62][71]. - The concept of "door-to-door matching" in relationships emphasizes the need for equality and mutual respect, rather than one partner feeling inferior or obligated to please the other [72][74]. - The article concludes that the best relationships are characterized by mutual respect and appreciation, where neither party feels the need to compromise their self-worth [75][78].

Core Viewpoint - The article discusses the differences between precise interventions in psychological counseling and universal guidance in public communication, highlighting the importance of tailored approaches for individual psychological issues while advocating for more accessible language in public discourse [1][4]. Group 1: Psychological Counseling - Psychological counseling aims to help individuals, like the case of a 12-year-old boy, establish healthy psychological boundaries and express their needs [1]. - Counselors use precise language and Socratic questioning to challenge irrational beliefs and help clients differentiate between real consequences and imagined threats [2]. - Experimental behavior training is employed to encourage clients to practice expressing their needs in a safe environment, thereby reshaping their understanding of self-expression [2]. Group 2: Public Communication - Directly applying counseling language in public spaces can lead to misunderstandings and negative outcomes, such as creating crises in parent-child relationships [3]. - Public communication should utilize universal language that is empathetic and relatable, helping parents understand their children's emotional needs without labeling them negatively [3]. - The article emphasizes the need for public discourse to focus on basic psychological knowledge and positive guidance, avoiding absolute suggestions and allowing for flexibility [4].

Group 1 - The core issue of individuals struggling to maintain psychological boundaries often leads to sacrificing their own needs to please others, which is rooted in complex psychological mechanisms [1] - The "people-pleasing" addiction mechanism activates a reward circuit in the brain, resulting in a dopamine release that creates a temporary sense of pleasure, forming a dependency on this behavior [2] - Low self-worth leads individuals to overly rely on external validation, making them sensitive to rejection and prompting them to compromise their boundaries to avoid criticism [2][3] Group 2 - Negative feedback from the family of origin can create deep psychological scars, making individuals overly sensitive to similar negative evaluations in adulthood [3] - Cultural expectations often pressure individuals to conform to societal norms, leading them to abandon their own needs to meet the expectations of family or social groups [3] Group 3 - Continuous breaches of psychological boundaries can result in "psychological entropy," leading to decision paralysis and emotional overload, with individuals at higher risk of depression [4] - Relationships lacking boundary awareness can fall into a "power imbalance trap," where one party may manipulate the other, leading to feelings of exploitation and dissatisfaction [4] Group 4 - When psychological boundaries collapse, individuals may experience "existential anxiety," struggling to distinguish between their true selves and societal expectations [5] - Neuroimaging studies indicate that such individuals have abnormal activity in the default mode network, which is closely related to self-awareness [5] Group 5 - A three-step strategy for rebuilding psychological boundaries includes categorizing relationships into three circles: the core circle for close family, the collaborative circle for colleagues and friends, and the stranger circle for unfamiliar individuals [6][7] - Gradual behavioral training can help individuals practice saying no in low-risk scenarios, enhancing their ability to maintain boundaries [7] - Mindfulness meditation can strengthen the brain's ability to regulate emotional responses, helping individuals remain calm when faced with boundary violations [8]