（原标题：搞定一个人最好的方法，不是请客吃饭，而是坚持"登门槛效应"） 本文转载自微信公众号杨博士说心理（ID：ancareyang） 马克思说："人的本质是一切社会关系的总和"。 每个人都不是一座孤岛，与他人连接起来，才能创造更大的价值。 但经常会有这样的情况： 你渴望与其他人建立关联，但常常因为不会"提出请求"而感到挫败和无力。 那么，如何搞定一个人？你一定要知道一个心理学概念——"登门槛效应"（Foot-in-the-door Effect）。 今天，我想和大家聊聊这个话题，也许能找到答案。 一、什么是登门槛效应？ "登门槛效应"是指一个人一旦接受了他人的一个很小的要求后，为了避免认知上的不协调，或是想给他 人留下前后一致的印象，就有可能接受对方更高的要求。 这种现象，就好像登门槛一样，一步一个台阶，最终顺利地登上高处。 这个效应是美国社会心理学家弗里德曼与弗雷瑟提出的。他在1966年做了一个有趣的心理学实验。实验 过程是这样的： 他让助手去访问一些家庭主妇，请求被访问者答应将一个小招牌挂在窗户上，她们答应了。 过了半个月，实验者再次登门，要求将一个大招牌放在庭院内，这个牌子不仅大，而且很不美观。同 时 ...

Core Viewpoint - The article discusses the complexities of the parent-child relationship and whether parents can truly be friends with their children, emphasizing the need for a balance between parental authority and friendship qualities [2][11]. Group 1: Nature of Parent-Child vs. Friend Relationships - Parent-child relationships are characterized as "asymmetrical growth support relationships" where parents provide safety, establish rules, and guide values, necessitating a sense of authority [3]. - Friend relationships are defined as "symmetrical emotional reciprocity relationships" based on voluntary and equal interaction, focusing on emotional resonance and shared interests [3]. Group 2: Positive Aspects of Parents Trying to be Friends - Incorporating "friend traits" like empathy and respect can enhance trust and reduce communication barriers, allowing children to express their inner thoughts and avoid psychological issues [4]. - Friend-like interactions help in the development of children's self-identity by validating their individual feelings and interests, which is crucial for healthy self-recognition [5]. - Demonstrating equal respect in interactions teaches children cooperation and respect for differing viewpoints, which is vital for their future interpersonal relationships [6][7]. Group 3: Risks of Overemphasizing Friendship - Abandoning the guiding role in favor of friendship can undermine the child's sense of security, leading to confusion about boundaries and authority [8]. - Neglecting the role of socialization can result in children lacking a sense of rules, making it difficult for them to understand the consequences of their actions [9]. - Parents may project their emotional needs onto their children, reversing roles and causing psychological harm by making children feel responsible for their parents' emotional well-being [10]. Group 4: Balancing Roles Across Developmental Stages - For children aged 0-6, parental authority is paramount, with friendship traits manifesting through play and emotional responses without replacing rule-setting [11]. - For children aged 6-12, a transition occurs where parents must balance authority with empathy, guiding children while allowing them to understand the significance of rules [12]. - For adolescents aged 12-18, parents should adopt a more equal and respectful approach, reducing directive communication while maintaining essential guiding principles [13]. Conclusion - Parents can be trusted friends to their children while fulfilling their guiding responsibilities, achieving a balance that benefits the child's psychological development [14].