神译局是36氪旗下编译团队，关注科技、商业、职场、生活等领域，重点介绍国外的新技术、新观点、新风向。 编者按：更深的联结意味着更强的信任，而更强的信任又意味着更少的防御。本文来自编译，希望对您有所启发。 图片来源：阿尔瓦罗·卡诺瓦斯（Alvaro Canovas）/Getty Images 本文原作者为阿达尔·科恩（Adar Cohen）和尼克·维格纳尔（Nick Wignall）。阿达尔致力于帮助人们进行重要对话。他拥有都柏林圣三一学院冲突解决博士 学位，曾在哈佛大学、芝加哥大学授课，并应不丹国王邀请在谢鲁布策学院讲学。现居美国新罕布什尔州。尼克是心理学家兼组织顾问，专注于高绩效团队 与个人的效能提升。他每周为焦虑型高成就者撰写关于培养自信、主动性和韧性的通讯文章。现居俄勒冈州波特兰市。 没有什么比对方陷入防御状态更能迅速破坏对话的了，甚至是破坏整个关系。这种问题在个人与职场等多种情境中反复上演： 这类情境的处理向来棘手，因为本能的应对往往适得其反：约下属开会澄清误会，反而让气氛更尴尬；次日清晨再向配偶提起转学问题，终究会演变成争 吵，让整日都笼罩在紧张中。 然而，若能采取策略性应对，完全有可能巧妙化解防御 ...

Group 1 - The concept of "strangeness" has become commonplace in daily life, blurring the lines between strangers and non-strangers, leading to a sense of indifference towards others [2][3] - Young individuals are increasingly anxious about interactions with acquaintances rather than strangers, often maintaining relationships in a state of estrangement [2][3] - The phenomenon of "self-strangeness" emerges, where individuals question their own decisions and feelings, leading to a sense of disconnection from oneself [2][3] Group 2 - In a society filled with strangers, individuals may experience both unease and excitement, but the overarching feeling is one of loneliness and confusion regarding their existence [3][4] - "Reverse empathy" arises from the perception that everyone is too similar, leading to a lack of curiosity and interest in understanding others [4][5] - The idea that "everyone is the same" can result in feelings of isolation, as individuals struggle to find meaningful connections among those who appear similar [5][6] Group 3 - The "utilitarian hypothesis" suggests that individuals focus on relationships that yield tangible benefits, simplifying interpersonal dynamics [6][7] - The process of "de-historization" involves removing aspects of one's life that do not align with mainstream expectations or current interests, leading to a loss of personal history [6][7] - The emphasis on maintaining a polished public persona, including the use of photo editing and social media curation, reflects a desire to conform to societal expectations and erase past experiences [7]