洞见 （ DJ00123987 ） —— 不一样的观点，不一样的故事， 3000 万人订阅的微信大号。点击标题下 蓝字 " 洞见 " 关注，我们将为您提供有价值、有意思的延伸阅读。 剧中，宁绣绣和封大脚的婚姻，不是传统的门当户对，也没有万贯家产打底，却在岁月的磨砺 中，绽放出了动人的光彩。 ♬ 点上方播放按钮可收听洞见主播一凡 朗读音频 简·奥斯汀曾说： "结婚，只考虑家境是荒谬的，不考虑家境是愚蠢的。" 这句话如同一盏明灯，照亮了我们对婚姻本质的探寻之路。 当下热映的《生万物》，就为这句话作出了生动的注脚。 作者： 枳为橙 来源： 读书369 （ID: dushu369com） 婚姻到最后，拼的从来不是财富多少，而是家风好坏。 也让已为人父母的我明白：结婚一定要看家境。 看家境，不是看他家是否有钱有势，而是看他家人的为人处世、生活方式和家庭氛围。 因为这些与他的人生密不可分，与你的生活将有关联。 善良的家风，是一个家庭最宝贵的底色。 蔡元培说过："家庭者，人生最初之学校也。一生之品性，大抵生于家庭。" 父母拥有什么样的品行，孩子就会走什么样的路，家庭的发展也会基于同样的底色。 《生万物》中，绣绣在从土匪窝逃 ...

34岁的小麦用"结婚搭子"结束了她跟父母之间旷日持久的催婚纷争。 从20多岁开始，她就频繁被父母催婚。父母隔两天就会分享一些"不结婚孤独终老"的链接给她，每个月都会推给她两三个异性让她去相亲。 但是在她看来，父母根本不在乎她的想法，他们只希望自己按照他们的想法活着，父母给她介绍的相亲对象，几乎是在她的世界里"永远不会出现的人"。 随着年龄渐长，被逼迫的程度也越来越重。她跟父母之间爆发过很多次争吵，有时候甚至会挨打。 其实她并不排斥婚姻。 她也憧憬过理想的婚姻和伴侣。她很认真地谈过两段"可以考虑婚姻"的感情时，她发现，"对方想结婚的时候我不想结，我想结婚的时候对方不想结。"人 生节奏的错搭，让她迟迟无法进入一段理想的婚姻。 在传统的家庭观念和个人空间之间，她陷入了困境。一方面，她想按照自己的意愿生活，另一方面，她又不断接受来自父母和环境的催婚压力。 经过长久的思考后，她决定"相亲降级"，为自己找个"结婚搭子"，给父母一个满意的交代。于是，她在小红书发了一条寻找"结婚搭子"的帖子，她明确强 调了自己的"不婚主义"，但是迫于家庭压力决定找个异性完成"结婚"这项规定动作，双方不必投入感情，婚后各自独立。 由于已经在北 ...

Core Viewpoint - The article discusses the emerging trend of young individuals in China seeking "marriage partners" or "marriage buddies" as a response to familial pressure to marry, reflecting a shift in societal attitudes towards marriage and personal autonomy [4][10]. Group 1: Personal Experiences and Societal Pressures - The protagonist, referred to as Xiaomai, faced persistent marriage pressure from her parents since her twenties, leading to frequent arguments and emotional distress [5][7][12]. - Xiaomai's parents, influenced by traditional values, imposed their views on her, disregarding her personal preferences and desires in choosing a partner [6][12][17]. - The increasing pressure from her parents culminated in her decision to find a "marriage buddy" to satisfy familial expectations while maintaining her independence [9][19]. Group 2: Changing Perspectives on Marriage - A survey by the Chinese Academy of Sciences revealed that 34% of post-95s no longer view marriage as a necessity, with 51.8% of college students deeming it unimportant, particularly among women [9]. - Xiaomai's approach to marriage reflects a broader trend where marriage is transitioning from a compulsory life milestone to a more optional choice, with many young people prioritizing personal freedom over traditional expectations [9][10]. Group 3: The Concept of a "Marriage Buddy" - Xiaomai defines a "marriage buddy" as a practical partnership based on mutual agreement rather than romantic love, emphasizing shared values and responsibilities [21][24]. - The arrangement includes maintaining independence in personal lives while fulfilling familial obligations, such as participating in family events and ceremonies [21][23]. - Xiaomai's experience in finding a suitable "marriage buddy" highlights the importance of compatibility in lifestyle and values, rather than emotional attachment [24][25]. Group 4: Responsibility and Future Considerations - Xiaomai emphasizes the need for individuals to take responsibility for their choices, acknowledging the importance of being able to handle the risks associated with unconventional arrangements [32]. - The article concludes with Xiaomai planning to formalize her arrangement, including discussions about living arrangements and potential future family planning, indicating a pragmatic approach to modern relationships [32].

Core Viewpoint - The article discusses the concept of finding a "marriage buddy" as a solution for individuals facing familial pressure to marry, allowing them to fulfill parental expectations while maintaining personal independence [6][21]. Group 1: Personal Experiences and Family Dynamics - The individual faced persistent pressure from parents to marry, leading to frequent arguments and emotional distress [3][4]. - Despite not being opposed to marriage, the individual struggled to align personal desires with parental expectations, often feeling misunderstood by their family [5][12]. - The individual decided to seek a "marriage buddy" to satisfy parental demands without compromising personal freedom, highlighting a shift in societal views on marriage [6][8]. Group 2: Changing Perspectives on Marriage - A significant portion of the younger generation, particularly those born in the 1990s, no longer view marriage as a necessity, with 34% of this demographic considering it non-essential [6]. - The article emphasizes that marriage is transitioning from a compulsory life milestone to an optional choice, reflecting broader societal changes [6][23]. Group 3: The Concept of a "Marriage Buddy" - The "marriage buddy" is defined as a partnership based on mutual agreement rather than romantic love, focusing on compatibility and shared responsibilities [15][22]. - The individual outlines specific criteria for selecting a "marriage buddy," including health, emotional stability, and a shared understanding of independence [15][17]. - The relationship with the "marriage buddy" is characterized as a supportive alliance, where both parties respect each other's personal space and commitments [19][22]. Group 4: Future Considerations and Responsibilities - The individual plans to formalize the arrangement with a marriage agreement, ensuring clarity on roles and responsibilities, including financial aspects and family interactions [26]. - There is an acknowledgment of potential future challenges, such as family expectations regarding children, and a willingness to navigate these issues collaboratively with the "marriage buddy" [26].

中国父母在给子女买房这个问题上，似乎有一种执念。父母们从以前必须给儿子买房，为他成家提供必要的物质基础，到现在女儿也同样需要房子来增加生 活的底气和安全感。 但是，也有一部分家长坚持不给女儿买房，即便他们有很多的"闲钱"。 如果只有一个女儿，在条件允许的情况下，到底要不要给女儿买房？相信很多父母都遇上了同样的难题。 同事小李成长于工薪家庭，她的父母省吃俭用大半辈子，在小李大学毕业时，倾尽全力给她买了一套房子。 对于买房问题，她的爸爸如此说道："我要买房子那会儿很多人劝我不要买，女孩子有个娘家就够了，以后结婚她的老公肯定也会有房子，何必提前买一套 呢？" "可是我不这么想，我希望我的女儿有一个自己的房子，以后嫁人了如果遇人不淑，她可以有底气离开，不至于受了委屈没有地方可去。" 可是这与家庭条件还不错的金叔叔的想法截然相反。金叔叔家有一个宝贝女儿，可是迟迟不愿意给女儿买房，但绝对不是因为不够爱她。 原来，金叔叔的女儿已经30岁了，还未谈婚论嫁。 随着社会的发展，人们的思想观念也在随之改变。 在父母看来，家庭经济宽裕的情况下，都想着给自己的子女买一套房子，给男孩买房更多是为了结婚成家，给女孩买房则是为了让她们更有底 ...